Accountable Citizens Updates

5 Stages Of Grief Through My Own Experiences

I'm sharing my personal story of going through the 5 stages of grief to help you when you face the same journey.

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It's Been A Tough Two Weeks

Sincere apologies for the extended absence from this column. Our tight-knit editorial team that is in so many ways a family has gone through a difficult two week stretch, culminating in the loss of an actual family member.

We asked the same questions so many have asked in similar situations. Questions that will never be answered, at least not in this earthly lifetime. Why would someone who spent most of a shortened adult life working to help people out of dangerous, lonely places be taken at an early age?

Why would someone who did all the right things in terms of health, proper nutrition, fitness, everything that is supposed to promote longevity be stricken with a fatal disease that would ravage all vital organs with the rapid efficiency of a wildfire roaring through a neighborhood?

We've asked these questions, we've sat silently in sadness and we've been rendered ineffective in our mission as editors of this website, held back by grief, anger, and finally acceptance.

That acceptance leads us to remember how supportive of our mission our lost family member was and how it would serve the memory of that family member by getting back into the work.

We've heard from dozens of people who came forward with their own personal stories of how our lost relative changed their lives, many of them stating that their lives were saved by those experiences.

So the time for grieving is over. We'll still be sad. That's part of being human. We'll experience more loss along the journey, as that is also part of human life. But we have the example of a life well-lived to inspire us, to guide us, and to encourage us to keep doing what we started.

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The Opportunity This Life Provides

A couple days ago in this spot I wrote from a quiet spot in a medical facility. You can find that post by scrolling down to the page titled "Perspective." On that day I saw a steady stream of people coming in to fight off serious disease.

At some point we all come to the end of our lives. We don't get to avoid that fate. But we get to decide what we do with the time we have in this life. On that day in the medical facility I thought of this short video.

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A List of Character Traits With Wizardly Perspective

Guest author T.O. Illustratio invokes a classic movie to illuminate the value in this short list of character traits.

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Being Accountable Is When...

Being accountable is when:

* We don't blame other people when we are at fault. We also don't look to trap people in mistakes.

* We don't make excuses. "It isn't my fault. The sun was in my eyes. I'm a victim of my environment. I didn't get a fair chance. The devil made me do it." Any excuse will work when looking for an easy way out of being accountable for your actions.

* We take responsibility for our part in every situation. We recognize that what is going on in our own world, in our relationships, and in all of life are the direct results of our beliefs and actions. Change our beliefs and we can change our actions. If we aren't happy with a situation, we can either change the situation or change our beliefs in that situation.

* "How are we part of the problem?" If we all asked that simple question more often, we would solve so many problems. And then follow up with, "How can I be part of the solution?"

* Recognize "Toxicity" signs. Especially within ourselves because if we have them, we will certainly spread them. Check out our page about codependency to learn more.

* We offer sincere apologies when we hurt someone. This is so important but so overlooked. And it goes together with the next bullet point. When we cause harm, tell the person you are sorry and do so in an accountable manner. When we say something like, "I'm really sorry, but I was having a bad day" or "You don't understand but I was under lots of stress," we've already wasted the opportunity to be sincere and to be part of the solution.

* Listen better. So much could be solved, so many challenges rectified with simply listening better. When angry shouting goes away, when decibel levels lower, stress and anxiety go down as well. Be accountable for your own actions in confrontational situations. Someone has to be the example and as always it starts with the person we see in the mirror.

* Get over it. Yeah, I know. Life isn't fair. We don't all get the same amount of good breaks. Quit looking for a hand out and instead, get better and offer a hand up to lift someone who can then lift someone else. If you've been hurt, and almost everyone has been hurt at least a dozen times in life, let it go and move on past the hurt. Someone once wrote, "Wounded people wound people."

* If we start it, finish it. Such a basic concept, but we all face this obstacle at some point. It gets tougher than we thought, we lose confidence or maybe lose sight of why we started something.

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Perspective

I'm writing this column from a quiet area in a specialized care facility. I'm here this morning because I drove someone over to map out a plan for combating a serious illness. We listened to the most recent test results and the ramifications attached to those results. There were difficult choices to make, but a plan was created.

I noticed the following quote from Mother Teresa on the wall of the surgeon's office. I'm sharing it with you today.

“Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is a beauty, admire it.

Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it.

Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it.

Life is a game, play it. Life is costly, care for it.

Life is wealth, keep it. Life is love, enjoy it.

Life is mystery, know it. Life is a promise, fulfill it.

Life is a sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it.

Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it.

Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it.

Life is too precious, do not destroy it. Life is Life, fight for it!.”

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What Makes Good Leadership Qualities? Wry Insight From A Guest Author

Guest author T.O. Illustratio offers a tongue-in-check answer to the question, "What makes good leadership qualities?"

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What Is Morality and Ethics? A Solid Guide If Grounded In Truth.

What is morality and ethics? It can be a fundamental guide to life, but only if backed by a solid truth baseline.

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Set The Right Expectation To Provide Everyone A Level Playing Field

If we set the right expectation, we grow exponentially in prosperity and as a beacon of moral integrity. If we lower the standards, everyone is diminished.

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Inspirational Quotes About Life That Will Inspire And Encourage!

Sometimes we all get stuck in a dark place and need a lift. These inspirational quotes about life will encourage confidence and inspire success.

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Why Was It Important? This Question Has The Power To Clarify Purpose

Use this simple question. "Why was it important?" Use it to identify your purpose, to develop new leaders, and to help inspire accountable citizens of America.

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The American Dream Hasn't Disappeared

The American dream is alive and well. That dream began with the promise of equality for all humans and offered the opportunity, never a guarantee, but always the opportunity for everyone who does the work in an honest, forthright manner to succeed.

The bedrock of that noble dream was an acceptance of being accountable for our actions and accepting responsibility and the corresponding consequences of those actions. That American dream also had at it's core a fierce determination to protect the innocent citizens and to use our personal success stories to lift up other citizens.

As with any dream or ideal, sometimes we veer off the narrow path of holding ourselves and our fellow citizens accountable for our decisions. At times it's easier to take shortcuts. It's seems as though right now in this point in history, there is far less personal accountability and much more handout mentality that suggests no responsibility for anything and a desire to be taken care of by government stipends.

Accountable citizens recognize this and we lead in a productive manner. We learn how to respond in positive ways, rather than react in violent retaliation.

The American dream is still out there. We just need a return to accountability and responsibility. As noted satirist Bill Maher once stated, "We have a Bill of Rights. What we need is a Bill of Responsibilities."

Accountable citizens are brave citizens. That could mean standing on the front lines of military defense for part of the American population. But for all, it means asking questions and pressing for truthful answers. It means putting action behind the words, "service to country above self."

This cannot be understated in the current climate in our nation that seems to put more emphasis on loud condemnation and zero interest in applying common sense and logic into discussions.

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Scaring The Devil

“I want to live my life in such a way that when I get out of bed in the morning, the devil says, "aw (shoot), he's up!” We cleaned up one word in this Steve Maraboli quote. In our editorial room, this is one of our favorite quotes. It probably gives the most succinct call to action in our efforts to live out those three core values on our home page.

Here's another one from Isaiah, Chapter 6 that offers a similar declaration. "Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, “Whom shall I send? Who will go for us?” “Here I am,” I said; “send me!”

We wrote in the first part of our three part series about finding purpose in life, "How to find your purpose starts with letting your mind work on solutions. The next part is about action. Passion doesn't cause action. Passion occurs because of action. And action always follows intention. An intention to match those vital core values."

We aren't experts in web design. So our website is always a work in progress. We're trying to organize the pages in a little better order. We've been advised to look at our home page as a bowl. A bowl that contains specific pages about our theme, which in our case is about becoming accountable citizens of America and developing new leaders to do the same.

We're trying hard to make this a source of quality information and a place to share opinions. We're working hard to offer pathways to help anyone else who wants their own new day to be an opportunity to worry the devil.

Someone once said a rising tide lifts all boats. That would apply to accountable citizens as well. Accountable citizens don't pass the buck. They don't ask for a free ride and they admit mistakes. That kind of rising tide will lift our nation to new heights.

It's why we write what we write.

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Eugenics in America Has a Hidden History

To understand eugenics in America requires looking deep inside a complex system of segregation and information control.

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Here's Some Fun Facts!

Our post in this section from yesterday, which can be found just below this entry got me to thinking a little bit. Or maybe I should write, got me to remembering? It stirred up memories of lost time spent glued to a television screen or locked into heated debates with the guys I hung around with, all of us knowing full well that we had the answers to all these earth-shattering problems.

But revelations come from mysterious places, like a bright light in a darkened sky that shines a pathway out of lost wandering, back on to the road to productivity and happiness.

Most of you reading this are probably already secure in your knowledge that what I will write in this short digest is factual and obvious. It should have been for me, but sometimes we don't know what we don't know. So let me share some fun facts.

The sky isn't falling. No matter how bad they tell you it is out there, it isn't that bad. When the talking heads blare into the screen you find yourself transfixed upon, anxiously waiting to hear how the sitting president is certainly going to end life as we know it, no matter who happens to be the sitting president at the time, take note of this important fact.

These talking heads have no interest in truth. They have complete interest in the paychecks that are inextricably tied to their ratings share. If they can keep us locked into their every word, all the while knotting our stomachs in stress and fear, they get paid.

Since the sky isn't really falling, you can dissolve that knot in your stomach. I know this because I had that knot and I had it from accepting too much of the mindless blather disguised as journalistic integrity. Go outside and see for yourself. The sky is still in the same place. Take a walk in the sun and notice how much better you feel.

And when you get back, it will still be okay. There will be challenges. Some things will be hard. But the world isn't ending. We have such limited time on earth and it took me far too long to realize I was giving away valuable hours in servitude to these chat boxes of gossip and misery-peddling.

We all get those same 24 hours. We can use them to learn new things, true things, not hate-baiting, we can see the good in people, listen more, yell less, and just relax.

The sky isn't falling. It wasn't falling four years ago when the same fear and acrimony gripped those who staked their position in front of their favorite talking heads who merely told them what it took to cement their opinions.

I learned that if I go about my life trying to stay true to those three core values on our home page and act in service to others, my life will feel pretty darn good.

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